Rintrah Net

Some ideas on how to answer the question.

As a result of the clinical trials I have been taking part in over that past number of years, I have become unable to function without mapping out every detail of my future. I have an extensive database of possible timelines that I have developed and re-developed. One of the side-effects of the tests is my complete lack of inhibition when it comes to speaking the truth. This is true when I talk to other people and myself.

So, as you can see in this timeline that I developed while in the waiting room, in the next year I will be offered a job either here or in a competing bank. I will, within a year, have a nervous breakdown and be hospitalized for about 5 months. During which time one of the doctors from the clinical trials will be attending me. He will, for a short period, have cured me of most of the unwanted effects of the tests. At which point I will return to work for about two years. I will, in that time, be named employee of the month 14 times. The first of which will be the first time that bank has ever awarded it to anybody ever.

After three and a half years, my symptoms will begin to re-surge. And I do mean surge. They will return with a vengeance. I will, for about a year or so, battle with them and I will, for the most part, keep them at bay. However, as we near the 5 year mark, my anxiety about the correctness of this premonition will get the better of me and I will steal a car, lose control and hit a brick wall. While in the hospital, a lawyer will visit me and sue you for willful negligence because of your prior knowledge of this possible situation. Once the case is settled, out of court, I will no longer need to work or take part in the trials any more.

Honest to a Fault

In 5 years I hope to have advanced within the company. This is a great place to work. I don’t know that for sure, but when I Googled it, I found nothing negative about it. I found nothing positive, but that just means that there is nothing so bad that someone felt they needed to mention it. Has anyone ever told you that you look like Pierce Bronsnan? No? Well, I mean, if you didn’t have blonde hair and a red beard, you would look exactly like him. Especially if he bulked up and gained 100 pounds. By bulked up, I mean muscle mass. You are in no way fat or overweight. The term “morbidly obese” gets thrown around alot these days. I hate that. You are not one of those people at all.

In 5 years, I hope to have learned the ropes well enough here that people will look to me for inspiration or if they have any questions. I hope to provide insight into how the organization can run better. Not that it isn’t running like a well tuned machine now. Under your leadership it has been working smoothly. I, by no means, mean to imply that the company is doing poorly now. I just want it to work better. I live to help people and I want to help you and this company. Not that you need help. Gosh no.

Just look at these pictures on your desk of your family on vacation. You definitely don’t need help. Clearly, this picture of you in a speedo shows everything I need to know. Not that I need to know about your speedo or what you have packing in there. No, no, no. But your wife, she definetly knows and you have done quite well for yourself. In five years I hope to have someone like her. Not her, exactly. She is your wife. I would have my own. In five years time, I see myself on that beach.

Desperate to Please

I see myself, in five years time, running an ice-cream shop slash used bookstore slash laundromat slash karaoke bar. I love to mix things together and multitask. Just imagine, singing a song for all my friends as I change loads of laundry. After that I can have myself a mint ice-cream cone and a cold beer while reading a good book.

That is my dream. I understand that it doesn’t really work well into this job, per se. But I consider it a stepping stone. I will, during the day, work here and trade stocks online. And, in the evening fix cars while teaching myself to knit with my feet. I love to work with all my limbs. I taught myself American sign language, with my hands of course. And how to give haircuts using my feet. The other day, while practicing a new hair style on my cousins kid and interpreting a university lecture for a deaf friend, I was also pushed into learning how to do first aid with my feet. The hair cut had to be cut short (pun intended) because, for some unknown reason, my cousin’s kid’s ear had spontaneously become dislodged. I think that is the word for it.

Anyway, in five years I plan to start a barbershop quartet with co-workers here. We will quit and begin touring America and providing mani-pedis for the audience. Also some light dentistry.

Multitasker Extrordinaire

Alright, I don’t need five years. But if you give me five years, I will take it. In five years time I will be running this organization. I will spend the first couple of months learning whose-who of the organization. Then, using that info, I will determine the weak members and will have mapped out the entire power structure of the organization. With that knowledge I will leverage the weaker players and stronger players against each other. I will obtain as much confidential data as possible and find out where the corruption in the organization lies. With this information I will start to blackmail members of the organization and infiltrate the ranks of the different levels within the hierarchy. Certain members will learn to trust me exclusively while others will be scared of me. My power in the organization will continue to grow and I will rise in the ranks from just the nanny and eventually replace your husband.

Way Over-Zealous